Something about my life is so unique right now. I mean im actually decently happy, that’s probably half of it. But the other part is im not happy at all yet im like not bothered by it (most days). Its a very strange feeling to be i guess depressed but like okay with it. I think its because ive been through soo much bullshit, so many shitty hands and now im so much more grateful for life its self. im just content i guess. Which i mean is kinda pushing it because i always want more, i always could have something else, which is the addict part of me. But i guess for now im just okay and thats okay with me. I know it may get worse here and there but in the overall picture its gonna get better. i know it will. And throughout my life ive heard that too many damn times, itll get better, I hated that phrase mostly cause i didnt believe in it and i convinced myself it wasnt true. but it is. Shit does get better. Like they say nothing gold can stay, nor can anything shitty. Nothing is permanent. Nothing at all. So remember that when your having a shitty day or month. And try to forget it when all the odds are in your favor. xo.